While I'm Waiting, I Will Serve You

"Therefore humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that He may exalt you in due time, casting all your care upon Him, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7
"The Lord is good to those who wait for Him, to the soul who seeks Him. It is good that one should hope and wait quietly for the salvation of the Lord." Lamentations 3:25-26

"Wait on the Lord; be of good courage, and He shall strengthen your heart; Wait, I say, on the Lord!” Psalm 27:14

“He has made everything beautiful in its time … God shall judge the righteous and the wicked, for there shall be a time there for every purpose and for every work.” Ecclesiastes 3:11,17

"But those who wait on the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles, they shall run and not be weary, they shall walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40: 31


John Waller wrote a song called "While I'm Waiting." Not only is the song beautiful, but it also speaks so much truth, and the lyrics are so applicable to our lives. He says that, though it is painful, he will continue to wait upon the Lord, patiently, and he will trust Him. He also says he will "move along, bold and confident, taking every step in obedience" while he is waiting on the Lord. Though it's not easy, he waits on the Lord faithfully and peacefully. The Bible tells us that the Lord is good to those who wait on Him, and that the Lord's purposes will always be revealed after a period of waiting and of obedience. The verses at the beginning of this note are just a few of many verses on waiting on the Lord. Being patient and able to wait on the Lord's timing is one of the more difficult things for us to do, and we often struggle with it in our walk with God. We often struggle with waiting on God to deliver us from trials in our lives. James says that our trials will make our faith stronger and make us more perseverant. Trials occur for different lengths of time, and sometimes they last a lot longer than we expect. We live in such a fast-paced world, and it is so hard for us to accept that God's timing is often a LOT slower than ours, and to trust that His timing is best. When God places trials in our lives, He wants to work in us so that we can spiritually grow. These trials are NECESSARY for our spiritual growth and are a part of God's plans for our lives.


In November, I began my journey with cancer, and I have been able to see God's faithfulness through that trial. I have now overcome it, and I could not be more thankful for the past few months. If you asked me if I could choose not to have had cancer, I would actually tell you no. Don't misunderstand me: cancer stinks, and it would have been great not to have it. But that wasn't God's plan, and I would never want to change that. It's so hard to understand God's timing, and why God gives us certain trials to face, but I think it's a lot easier to understand it after you have overcome it. In the midst of things, it is so difficult to patiently wait because, as humans, we cannot fully comprehend the ways of the Lord, and we cannot always see the purpose of things until a lot later.
I just read this quote in an article about God's timing, and I love it: "God’s wisdom and timing will always be perfect in every single situation that you will ever face in this life – so learn how to rely on it, as it will help keep you safe and out of harm’s way, along with keeping you on His divine path for your life and making your life that much more productive in Him." Now that I'm finished with chemo and radiation and I'm cancer-free, it's WEIRD. It's weird to have overcome such a huge trial and to transition from everything. Radiation hasn't had side effects for me really, and so I've already been transitioning back to my "normal" self, but it's confusing. I think I have been so used to being sick and going to the hospital ALL the time that being finished scares me! I know that I'm cancer-free, but I don't know how to be me again. Not that I wasn't me, but I was me with cancer, and me struggling with emotions and physical feelings I had never before experienced. I learned quickly that God wanted me to use my cancer for His glory, and I tried not to focus on myself too much, but it changed who I was. It's almost unexplainable because it's a personal experience, but all I can say is, God draws you so close to Him through trials, and especially through crazy ones like cancer. You become dependent only on Him because He's the only One you can depend on and trust for your healing.

I had cancer at age 21. God healed me from that cancer at age 21. God doesn't always heal, and He picks and chooses who to heal and when He will heal. It's hard to be patient and to understand why God does things when He does, and to wait and see how things play out in a situation. We always want to rush through everything, to press fast forward on our circumstances, to know what will happen. But, God is the only One with this sovereignty and knowledge. His plans are perfect and His timing is also perfect. So many of my friends are graduating in a few weeks. It's actually been really hard on me thinking about them leaving, me being a senior in just a few months, and insecurities with timing and plans have been on my mind a lot. I would love for everyone to stay here in Birmingham, but God has different plans for everyone, and He has placed those friends in my life for a specific amount of time for a specific reason. I know I will keep in touch with some, if not all, of them, but I think accepting change and facing transitions and trusting God's timing is hard for me. Trying to rush things, whether if it is in a trial or in other areas of your life, such as relationships, calling, or spiritual growth, is simply not a good idea. Let's be still and know that He is God, and continue to serve Him while we wait on His PERFECT timing.